This week I am dedicating my blog to Motherhood. With Mothering Sunday fast approaching I wanted to spend a week enveloped in Appreciation for Motherhood, in all it's guises. In a series of amazing guest posts we are hearing what Motherhood means to an array of writers. Our guest writer today is fellow Special Needs Mum and blogger Donna, who writes over at www.autismandlove.com. All contact details for Donna can be found at the end of the article. Enjoy.
So I'm sat here on a lazy Saturday night watching "the matrix". I'm watching the female character, Trinity, kick the ass of the agents ably accompanied by Keanu Reeves and my mind starts wondering...as it does!
I've always had a childish infatuation with warrior women...strong confident kick ass females like Lara Croft inspire me! I once trekked through Guatemala for charity and back packed round Thailand inspired by this Xbox boy’s fantasy. Posing non-stop with fake gun in my hand whilst scaling volcanoes and dossing on beaches!
A lot can be achieved through role models. Whether they are fictitious or human? Whether they are empowered artefact hunters or Jane Austen heroines we all have to have someone we look up to. Someone we can take strength from.
There’s a modern day phenomenon called the "warrior mother". An army of women who have chosen to follow the strength of their inspirations and "kick ass" for their families. These women fight tirelessly on a daily basis for what is right. Not politically. Not a feminist movement. Not lobbying the government or staging protests. They are ordinary mothers living extraordinary lives within their own homes, every day. And what they fight for is their kids. And what’s right for their kids.
I've written before in wise words from..rocky balboa? about the habit people have once you get a diagnosis of following that with the words "get ready for a fight" and they are right but perhaps not just in the way they mean it. You see every day you fight and battle. With professionals. With schools. With ignorance and with bureaucracy. Even this week I've had my request for Jesse's assessment for sensory processing disorder turned down because she is autistic and therefore hard to assess. But I won’t give up. I will fight. Not necessarily with the professionals though. I will research private assessments and I will continue to make a nuisance of myself at the OT departments but most of all I will battle with the autism.
If the professionals won’t help me and if ignorance is rife. If people won’t listen then I must do it. All of it. And I will. If I can’t get the understanding and the assistance from an OT to help Jesse with her sensory issues then i must battle like a warrior and gather that knowledge myself. I must dedicate time and money into sensory play, give my time to her to help and assist her. Find out what she likes and don't like so she can calm down and find some peace from time to time.
If Cody needs a photograph taken of every item in the house that he may ask for to improve his communication then I'll do that too. If he needs patience and empathy whilst he’s kicking and slapping me then it’s my duty to give him that.
You see every day I soldier on for my children to do what’s right and in doing so I stand alongside mothers everywhere and declare ourselves warrior mothers. We may not have changed government legislation, we may not re write diagnosis journals or burn our bras in the street but behind closed doors every day we are fighting the disabilities that live alongside our children to make life better for them.
I don't have to change the world to be a warrior. I don't have to carry weapons tucked in my hot pants to be in battle. If every day I accomplish something within my own four walls that improves the quality of life for my kids even only for a minute then I'm as kick ass as Lara...I am a warrior mother.
My names Donna and I'm a mother of two children. I'm a mother of two autistic children. There's a difference and there always will be which is why I write a blog about my experiences, thoughts and emotions of being the mother to Cody (4) and Jesse-Leigh (3). In every other way we're your normal, average family..husband, kids, dog but once a week i unburden my soul at www.autismandlove.com and give people a glimpse into the life of a "special needs parent".