Guest Post : The Miracle of Motherhood

This week I am dedicating my blog to Motherhood.  With Mothering Sunday fast approaching I wanted to spend a week enveloped in Appreciation for Motherhood, in all it's guises.  In a series of amazing guest posts we are hearing what Motherhood means to an array of writers.  Our guest writer today is fellow blogger Amanda who blogs over at The Family Patch.  All contact details for Amanda can be found at the end of the article.  Enjoy.

***



When I was a child, there was one thing I knew for certain and that was that when I grew up I wanted to be a mum. I think I was probably born with a fully intact and activated maternal instinct, but it really kicked into overdrive when my own mother began childminding when I was 9. Suddenly, I couldn't wait to grow up and one day have kids of my own.

As I grew older, however, I began to realise that it might not be as easy as all that. I was diagnosed with Endometriosis at the age of 21 and knew that this could cause fertility troubles. I was even told that the twisting of one of my fallopian tubes could put me at risk of ectopic pregnancies. And when treatments for it became incredibly harsh during my mid-twenties there was even a point when TJ and I considered never having children.

But about a year before we were to be married, that maternal drive kicked in full force and I knew without a doubt that I wanted children. It didn't matter that practical issues might get in the way, this was something I felt far too deeply to ignore. And so a month after our wedding we began trying to conceive, and two months after that I found myself pregnant. What a shock!

At first we were blown away by how incredibly lucky we had been to fall pregnant so quickly. We had beaten the odds and were blessed beyond measure. But then the sickness kicked in. Badly. I suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum and spent a large percentage of my pregnancy in bed wishing I had never fallen pregnant in the first place. The one thing that kept me going above all else was the knowledge that I was expecting a child, the thing I had longed for my entire life and it would all be worth it in the end.

And it was. It was more than worth it. All the sickness and pain and worry, all the anxiety and depression and trauma... all of it was worth going through to meet our beautiful boy.

It was far from easy. Becoming a mother was so much harder than I ever imagined it could be. I never got to bloom and enjoy pregnancy, breastfeeding was a nightmare, and the sleep deprivation felt like it was going to send us insane some days. And what about that guilt? It feels like I find something new to feel guilty about every single day. But it's worth it... oh so worth it!

Because here I am, mother to a beautiful boy who astounds me with his love, his joy and his sheer enthusiasm for everything in life. Watching him grow and explore the world reminds me to see everything as new once more. I can find joy in the simplest things these days: a hug, a smile, even a cardboard box...

But more than that, being a mother makes me want to be the best I can be. It makes me want to face my demons and reach my potential, so that through example I can help my son reach his. It makes me want to do more for others whilst remembering that to do this I have to look after myself too. Gone are the days of burning the candle at both ends for something meaningless... these days I do it for my family and no one else. Or at least I try!

This is what I like to call 'The Miracle of Motherhood'. It is so much more than I can express in words. It is everything I have just written and much, much more. It is greater than anything I have ever experienced and something I wish everyone could enjoy. Being a mother is the hardest thing in the world, and yet it is the most beautiful and therein lies the miracle.

I wouldn't change it for the world (although I wouldn't mind a bit more sleep once in a while, if you're asking).

About Amanda

The Family Patch is written by Amanda. It includes all aspects of family life, from the everyday mundane tasks, through balancing work and family, to the things that inspire the entire family. Amanda blogs about everything including her health, the home, the garden and her love of photography (amateur) and crochet. Pretty much anything goes here, just like in life itself.  You can find Amanda on Twitter @amandaspatch