F is for ... February, Frustrating and Freezing

I haven't done a 'Wordy Wednesday' for a while, so thought I would try and get back in the groove of having a bit more structure to my blog posting again, as for reasons of 'living life and what it throws at you' they have become a bit hit and miss of late.  I was pleased to be able to get a Disability Diaries post out last week so making baby steps on the right track.

The introduction to this blog post really leads in quite well to the point of it.  For reasons beyond the control of the mere human that I am, since November things have been moving a three hundred miles an hour around our lives and there has been little time for sitting and pondering and physically being able to pull blog posts together. 

November saw us house hunting, December saw us move which lead straight into a very busy, but amazing Christmas and New Year.  January and sadly through to February, we have all been blighted with viruses and weeks of being under the weather (and we know, unwell children means you are even busier as they can't go to school / nursery and my two become super clingy) plus, The Hubby had another stint in hospital. 

Many people struggle with February.  It is still the depths of winter, it's usually still dark and gloomy, it feels like it has been like this for a long time and the fact that spring is still a whole month away can feel pretty depressing.  On top of that, if we are honest, February usually sees us all still pretty broke, just when a spend up might be one way to lift us out of the low mood.

However, I have not suffered with that for the last few years.  I put this down to being a stay - home - mum.  Months are not particularly that clear cut and just in general I have been a lot happier being at home with the children.  If it's cold outside, aside from the school run, it is my choice if I have to go out, or if we stay cozied up indoors.  In 2010 I was pleased we had reached February as it meant the arrival of J2 was pulling closer, and last year it was packed full of last minute 60th birthday planning for my Dad, 1st birthday planning for J2 and Wedding Planning for the Hubby and I!

So this year the approach of February did not phase me too much.  However, it's been a bit of a stinker to be honest.  I thought January was a bit of struggle, due to the aforementioned continuous plague of bugs / viruses / colds / coughs etc.  But the fact this has continued into February and throughout - thus postponing almost anything planned is just damn frustrating now.  The lack of attendance for the kids at school and nursery has a knock on effect for getting anything else done and this is now starting to get to me. 

Add to this the start of February flourished our country in snow and an extreme cold snap was not great fun either, it was quite literally freezing and our big old house, although had been really quite good up to then, the fact that it has original windows (drafty) and old doors (drafty) and an old roof (part collapsed with the snow so, drafty) couldn't stand up to the minus temperatures to the balmy degree's that I like to be honoured with indoors (yes I would relocate to Florida if given the chance!).

However, this is not a negative post, that's not my style.  Yesterday, after dropping J1 at school, I made the journey across to the shops with J2 in tow.  This is always a nail biting time.  J2, at present, will either be an angel or complete nightmare so I try and keep necessary visits short, sharp and to the point, in the hope we are in and out before 'meltdown city' occurs.  Yesterday, he was an angel (phew, a bag of buttons for once worked a treat - for some reason J2 can not usually be bribed with sweets), team that with the beautiful blue sky and sunshine and positively mild temperature, spirits started to pick up.

So yes, although we are in February and it has been cold, dark and germ frenzied, we have to remember that F is also for Fight (ie. Fighting Spirit) that at over the half way point of Freezing, Frustrating February, we are now seeing longer, lighter, warmer days and we can only hope health wise we are all on the mend and we can resume seeing other friends and family and getting out and about with energy and minus the need for a pharmaceutical filled back pack.

And if all of that starts to happen, we might start to get some better nights sleep, which is always a good pick me up, whatever the time of year.

C is for...Catch Me If You Can, Crap he's learnt the word 'No' and Cheek! (Wordy Wednesday)

As mentioned in numerous blog posts I have two children, J1 and J2.  J2 is always described as something along the lines of '18 months old, very energetic, stubborn / willful but gorgeous toddler...' and this week he could not have fitted that description better. 

The moment every parent dreads, the moment they know is coming, from when that little blue line shows up on the pregnancy test (or the word 'pregnant' on the very fancy pants ones) arrived in my household this week.  J2 learned the word ... 'No'.  Oh crap.  For want of a better reaction - 'Houston, we have a problem'.

Actually that should read 'problems', multiple.  As far as I can see, the issues are threefold:

Firstly, how do you continue to make your version of using 'No' meaningful if secondly, most of the time he uses it you are going to over-rule it and 'de-value' it.  Conundrum.  The third?  Oh that would be that he is so damn cute when he says it! 

He isn't at the running around in the tantrum 'No No No NOOOO' stage (yet - can sense it's en-route) but he obviously comes to a cross-roads in his mind (of either something he doesn't want to do, go, eat, drink etc) and his little mind springs into action with 'you can do it or use that 'no' word...', so he gets this poised little face and says 'Neeeeewwwwwww' and then kind of waits for a reaction.  If that doesn't make you want to laugh nothing will but I can't show him that!

The last couple of days however, have presented this current challenge in conjunction with another.  Also something that you know you are going to have to deal with at some point but in order to keep your sanity you push to the back of your mind with the one strand of hope that you will have an angel for a child.  It's the 'oh so very funny' (for them, not you) game of 'Catch me if you can' every time you need to; change a bum, get them dressed in the morning, get them changed throughout the day or get them ready for bed.  And goodness me, my little one is quick! 

I have tried the 'reasoning' tactic, i.e 'Come here and have this nappy / these clothes on and then you can go and play in the garden / go and have your warm milk' (delete as appropriate).  Does not work.  If anything only eggs him on.  I have tried the 'firm' tactic.  Does not work, only eggs him on.  I have tried the just following him around waving nappy / clothes with stern look on face.  Definitely does not work.  In fact, most definitely only eggs him on. 

The only thing I have succeeded in is the rugby tackle, which he believes is hilarious, until he realises that I have managed to sneak the pull up on in amidst tickles and then he kind of gives in to the clothes going on, well, that is if  in the time it's taken us to get back to the room with the clothes he hasn't managed to pull the nappy off.  If he has, then we are back to square one.  And although sometimes, if you have nothing else going on, no where to be or are not at the end of your patience level at the end of the day it can be a giggle, the other times its just draining!  Add to this the 'no' word leaving his (very cute) little lips with it, I think we can safely assume we have officially hit the 'terrible toddler time'.  I would assume many a blog post will come on those issues...

So, you would think that given the amount of cheek I am getting from J2, J1 would ease up on Mumma a bit, but no.  Recently J1 was spending some time at Nanny and Grandad's house and when I arrived I was informed not to go in and talk to him because he was in 'time out'.  After it had finished I went to him to ask why he was in 'time out', as we try and get him to do the explaining so we know he understands exactly why he was 'punished' and I got a dose of the 'tude that I recently experienced with the 'Why are you wearing two jumpers?' incident (see blog post A is for...) cue 'tut' and 'Cos I am'.  I could see my parents almost wetting themselves with laughter in the kitchen, so had to step out of his line of vision, compose myself before asking for an appropriate answer (which I never got incidentally).

This might not have irked me had I not already been given cheek from a 9 year old boy in town asking people if they 'had a light' (horrifying I know).  In a rush I barked 'No I haven't' with a disgusted look on my face, to which I could hear him mimicking as I strode away.  I returned home from this, to a husband laid up in bed after a foot operation, ringing me on my mobile downstairs, for 'a cup of tea with two sugars and a decent slice of ginger cake' numerous times (tut, cheek!) whatever happened to bellowing down the stairs?  I suppose I should just thank my lucky stars he hasn't got a bell...

Another 'C' I could have added in today was 'Corrrrrrr I am going to ache tomorrow' as I have just returned from my first run!  Hop over to my other blog 'The Run Mummy Run Mumma' to keep up with that grand plan!

B is for ... Baby Babble, Bottles and Bond... James Bond... (Wordy Wednesday)

I can hardly believe that it is Wordy Wednesday already.  Half the working week (well for people that go 'out' to work it is, for SAHM add the weekend into that 'working week') has passed and the bubbles of excitement that 'Thursday tomorrow' thoughts bring are starting to form.  For me and most SAHM (or Dads) it brings the 'Thursday tomorrow, two more days and Daddy/Mummy is home to help entertain while I pee in private' excitement.

The things I have to be 'Wordy' on this 'Wednesday' (ahh see what I did there...) about all begin with the letter... B.  What?  Not surprised?  Ah damn it, the title of the post gave it away didn't it?  Anyway, let's begin :

Baby Babble.  Oh my gosh, this is the cutest, yet most frustrating, baby phase that I have come up against yet.  To be fair, with waiting five years for J1 to start to talk (and it still makes me smile to this day, almost every word that leaves his mouth - as long as it's not done in 'whine' tone, where the pitch goes up so high only dogs on our street can hear) I thought I had been up against some frustration.

Now J2 is quite articulate in his gestures and getting his point across.  I am assuming for 18 months he is doing just fine with his speech and language (although J2 is baby number 2, I have no benchmarks from the same ages for J1 so this is all brand new to me).  He has a handful of very clear one letter words; 'Car' (usually with one car in hand, my car key in the other and a trail of destruction of cars trailing whatever route around the house he has taken).  'Bub-bils' (Bubbles, a favourite of both kids and myself, never too old for bubbles!).  'Juice' / 'Cheese' (no explanation required).  'Garsses' (glasses, usually being brought to me in two, or with an arm missing).  But just recently he has taken to coming very excitedly to me and 'Dush beba um natakiwa'

WHAT? 

How am I meant to decipher that?  And then he'll repeat it (in true Brit style, no different just louder).  I again look at him slowly shaking my head in confusion, mouth slightly open in the hope that the words will float through the air, jump into my mouth, reformulate into something I can understand and we can move on.  He says it a third and final time to which I have to say (in full patronising tone) 'YYYYYYYYYYYYeeeeessss, very good' in the hope that being positive will placate him.

Usually he then toddles off and I feel like a complete failure.  Occasionally the Hubby will look at me in the same confusion and note that he didn't have a clue either.  I make myself feel better by deducing that whatever it was either wasn't life threatening or changing because generally if it is something he really wants he takes my hand and drags me along (usually to the scene of the crime, wet patch on floor, toy broken in two etc...). 

Occasionally however, he will get as frustrated with me as I am with myself and has suddenly developed the (rather amusing) over dramatic (J2, over dramatic?  Never, I hear you say...) throwing himself on the floor and doing  'James Bond' style roll.  I am quite impressed, sometimes he can do three full rotations with the gusto that he gives it.  If he has his Bottle in hand he can look quite authentic!  And thus we move on to the issue of 'The Bottle'.

It's a big raging debate isn't it, that everyone seems to have an opinion on.  When should a baby / toddler / small child stop having a bottle?  Some say at a year old when they 'should stop having formula'.  Some say it's terrible for their teeth.  Some say why take away the only article that will calm your child down.  

I was lucky with J1, despite all of his problems he moved seamlessly from bottle to cup when he was a year old.  He really didn't mind (he did have a dummy mind you).  J2 on the other hand is less than keen.  But, J2 being 18 months now has a good set of gnashers and has taken to biting the teats and splitting massive hole in them, which mean they leak.  Everywhere.  Or of course, biting the ends right off.  Dangerous. 

A friend of mine has been having the same problem.  Her little boy is 2 and she decided the other day, after loss of another set of teats, that he was going to have to go 'Cold Turkey' and she would brave it out.  She has been pleasantly surprised by the lack of meltdowns over the statement 'No bottle, cup'.  I have decided that I will not be purchasing any new teats, so when the last few have gone that is it, and hoping that the introduction of a range of other cups (who knew there were so many though, talk about confusing there are more shapes, sizes, colours and textures than in a condom range!) will have sufficiently taken over.  If not I will be the one having the meltdown. 

My point on this is that everyone believes in and deals with the situation with their own child in a different way.  I was enjoying a day on the beach the other week with J2 and he had a bottle with his snack.  The man on the next beach mat, who had a similar aged child felt need to comment very loudly 'Look at that kid still having a bottle!  Little Archie doesn't still have a bottle, got rid of that ages ago' to his wife (who did look suitably mortified by the way). 

But, by the rules of parenting, I wanted to punch him full on in the face.  I wanted to say that from observing 'Little Archie' I was glad that my little J2 had a bottle over being a whining 'wouldn't go on the sand, wouldn't go in the water, wouldn't lick around the edge of the ice-cream' child.  But I kept that thought to myself.  Like he should of his.

Wow, that was a very Wordy Wednesday!

A is for ... Attitude, Applause and Ahhhh Coffee (Wordy Wednesday Blog)

This is my first attempt at keeping to my mission of having an 'organised schedule' for blogging as mentioned in my post on the Page 'About My Blog'.  Today being Wednesday, means that it is 'Wordy Wednesday' which means things that have happened in the week are plucked from the obscurity of my mind and linked together by the relevant letter of the alphabet, and as the title of this blog indicates, today it is A.

The first point raised in the title is 'Attitude' or 'Tude as it is referred to within our household.  This has been mentioned because I have been faced with the first bout of 'Tude from J1.  And this fact thrilled me so much that I had to mention it so that we can always remember it (although I always will).  In living life with J1 and all his disabilities and difficulties that life has dealt him, anytime anything occurs with him that resembles that of an 'ordinary' 7 year old I want to jump as high as the sky. 

The incident in question, was on the walk home from our first day 'back to school' yesterday.  I suddenly realised (as I frequently do) that J1 was not wearing the same clothes (usually tops) as what I sent him in.  On closer inspection I saw that he was in fact wearing his polo shirt and jumper I had sent him in, with another jumper over the top.  I decided to attempt to question him as to why he was wearing two jumpers?  Firstly, he tutted, then rolled his eyes and replied 'Because I am' sigh.

It was lucky that I was standing behind him pushing him along so that he did not see the inane grin that spread across my face, and it was all I could do to stop myself from snorting out a laugh.  Instead I composed myself and said, as seriously as was physically possible 'OK, don't give me the 'tude, I was only asking a question'.  And no we never did establish why he was wearing two jumpers!

The second A related word that warrants a mention is 'Applause'.  Both of my boys have suddenly developed the need to be applauded for everything they do.  This has been the case with J1 for a little while (if he finishes dinner on his own he announces 'Clap!', a drink 'Clap', plays with a toy 'Clap' you get the gist).  But all of a sudden J2 has started doing it too.  As he can't speak properly yet, he just starts clapping himself and shouts 'More' indicating we all have to join in.  I think it is sweet that J2 is copying his big brother but J1 seems to indicate that he is less than impressed and instead of clapping his little bro, sits with the biggest puss face that he can muster.  Again for me this is an achievement for J1, a bit of brotherly rivalry, hurrah!

Finally we have 'Ahhhh Coffee'.  This has been my chant for most of the day (well most of my days for the last 7 years actually) but in particular today (had to crack out the Italian Roast strength number 5 today - yep the big guns have seen daylight) as J1 decided that he was going to wake up at 3am, and not go back to sleep.  Now J1 stirs multiple times in the night to be repositioned but unless he is in real discomfort generally drifts back off.  It is not uncommon place for J1 to wake up around 5am (this is the general rule of thumb) and you can kind of lay and half sleep and half 'Mmmmm' to his chatting until it is time to get up at 7am, but not today, no. 

I could tell when I walked over to reposition him, with one eye half open (haven't managed to do it with both closed yet) that he had that glint in his eye that he was A.W.A.K.E.  A big smile and 'Is it time to get ready for school yet?  School today!' gave me the confirmation that I dreaded and believe me, no amount of gentle 'It's sleepy time' or change of tactic, stern 'J1 go back to sleep this minute!' worked.  No, it wasn't until 7am came around that he suddenly announced 'Mummy I'm tired'.  Tough love little dude, as you so clearly told me at 3am SCHOOL TODAY!

Thus the need for my 'Ahhhh Coffee'.  In a drip would have been good but had to take it cup for cup, which always makes you need to pee 500 times a day but I suppose that is little price for the ability to stay awake and tackle the daily duties that mummy-hood brings.  All in a day's work.  And after that early start, surely that has got to make for a better night tonight?  Always have to hope and end on a positive!