The Disability Diaries : Growth

When the letter arrived home from school, stating that J1 had an 'Activity Week' approaching, I read it and wondered if it might all be a bit too much for him to cope with.  A whole week of being out of routine.  A whole week of travelling to different venues.  A whole week of extra curricular, over stimulation for his brain.

However, as the week drew closer J1 showed none of his usual 'out of routine' anxiety.  When I mentioned it to him in conversation, which I tried to do every evening whilst I got him ready for bed, he got excited and repeated back what he had heard in class about the activities.  He even started to do his 'excited' clench.

 

However, having 10 years of experience on my side, my own anxieties did not lay to rest as I pessimistically thought 'The meltdown will come at some point.'

 

But... It never did.

 

It never did!

 

I waited for it to start appearing, the constant repetition that 'He doesn't have too.' or the waking in the night crying and saying 'He'll stay home today.'  Like the rain you expect to see after having two days of blazing sunshine on the UK shores in the summer, I waited.

 

Nada.

 

Nowt.

 

Not a peep.

 

He continued to be excited and verbally upbeat.  So we responded in the same way and by the time Monday morning arrived the house was buzzing with talk of 'Activity Week.'

 

The first day I had to drop him to the venue as it was a park closer to our home than the school.  My own anxieties returned, in the past when I have taken him somewhere with the school he would cry for me as I tried to leave.  But this year, when handover came, he was more interested in his friends and what they had brought for lunch and didn't give me a backward glance.  I actually walked away, back to the car to the sounds of 'Byeeeeeee Mummmmmm!'

 

I could have cried.

 

With joy! 

 

Such progress!  Such growth!  I had not seen it coming.

 

Puffed up with pride I looked forward to the following day when I would be, cue dramatic music, staying for the day with the class on the farm trip.

 

I was not to be disappointed and I must say, etch it in stone for it to lay written forever, it was one of the best days of my life.

 

I got to spend the day watching, with my own eyes, just how far J1 has come since January.  He has built real friendships.  Buddies.  School pals.  The other children wanted to hang back with him, hold his hand, chill with him.  Spend time in his company.  They argued over who's turn it was to sit next to him for lunch.  And J1 revelled in it. 

 

As did I.  Gone was the school trip of past whereby if I so much as attempted to smile at another student he would burst into uncontrollable sobbing.  He wore a smile all day, as bright and beautiful as the sun.

 

We always look for achievements for our children.  For J1 this was a huge one.  It was one giant step towards independence.  The only thing I really pray he will achieve, and achieve fully in life.  Despite of his physical disabilities.  To have friends to laugh and joke with.  To have friends to share experiences with.  To get involved. To enjoy life.

 

My boy is growing.

A Very Special Needs Christmas Show

My admiration for J1's school is great at the best of times, but none more so than whenever they do the same as every other school and put on displays, activities and shows.

 

Within this fantastic special needs school they are already dealing with a whole host of extra 'pupil needs'.  So where they find the time to organise, practise and execute Easter events, Summers Fairs, Christmas Fairs, Christmas shows to name but a few, is just inspiring to me.

 

Every day I am in awe of the dedication staff, assistants and volunteers have to help our children.  But at this time of the year, when they ensure that those children experience what every other child in every other school in the country are doing I am blown away.

 

Our annual invitation to the School Christmas Show came last week.  We asked J1 what he was doing in the school play and his response 'It's a secret, I not telling.'  All we knew is that we had to send in a funky hat, scarf and gloves for him.

 

Wonderfully the school hall was packed out with happy, expectant and 'already bursting with pride' parents.  The theme of the show was Christmas Movies.  With everything ranging from The Wizard of Oz to Elf, the individual classes performed dances, songs, little skits and gave us some unplanned comedy.

 

Watching the children, adorned in outfits, including some fantastic wheelchair incorporated ones (believe me - I was open mouthed at how wonderful The Tin Man looked in his chair and mentally made a note for next years Halloween costume) was both heartwarming and tear-jerking.

 

The great thing this year, J1 did not have a meltdown at the door of the hall resulting in him being whisked back to class.  He coped with all the noise and unfamiliarity and actually performed!  I will never watch The Snowman without thinking of his class performance again.

 

As the audience clapped and cheered and encouraged I was reminded of how lucky we are, that J1 is at school and involved.  That we can attend all of these wonderful activities like we will for J2 when he starts school.  Too many of my mummy friends are not in this position, and at this time of the year we should think about them, and how they are feeling.  We should think about all of the amazing children that are going to be spending Christmas in hospitals.

 

We should really appreciate what we have.