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From November 2011 Archives...
Me... In the Alternative Universe
I am sure that everyone has a version of themselves in their head that they think they would be if they were ever transported back to when they were young, single and child-free. I do, I like to call it 'Me, in the Alternate Universe'.
Don't get me wrong, I don't wish to ever be young, single and child-free again. No thank you very much. But I like to think that if I went back and knew what I knew now - in my 30's -
I would be a lot more savvy more appreciative of certain things. Things that as a wife and a mother we very often give up.
Now again don't get me wrong I haven't sat down and written a list of 'things to give up' now I am a wife and mother. But there are some things that I can no longer legitimately put at the top of my priority list. They have to fall by the wayside. Some of those things (e.g. drinking and partying) I have been happy to say goodbye to, most certainly day long hangovers.
But some of them I hold onto in my 'Me, in the Alternate Universe'. I hold onto them in the hopes that one day, when the kids are a little older and I get time to appreciate my husband once again I will also have time to appreciate me and the things I loved.
There are a wide and vast array of things - the things that I appreciate having or having time to do in my alternate universe - so here are just a few...
In my Alternate Universe I do work, but at my original job at the local university. I so did not appreciate the extra time I had when I worked a mere 10 minute drive from home. They also ran a scheme whereby they would allow you a set number of 'work hours' to go and do volunteering. This was an amazing missed opportunity by me and in my Alternate Universe I definitely take this up.
Working locally would mean that I would have the time to fit in at least 3 early evening runs per week...
...followed by a lovely, luxuriously deep, hot, bubble bath with my favourite music blasting away in the bedroom whilst I undertook - at leisure - any beauty regimes I wanted.
I would have pride in my flat. I would decorate it myself slowly and deliberately. It would be uncluttered and have display cabinets / space for my lovely things to be out and to be appreciated (rather than packed in storage in the dark and desperate depths of the loft). Be free gorgeous hot pink stemmed Martini glasses that I painstakingly managed to get home from New York in one piece - be free to look beautiful!
I would take one evening a week to catch up with friends. One to relax and watch movies. One evening a week to experiment with new recipes in the kitchen. One to clean and iron (and I only need one evening because there is only my clothes to iron) and one evening to be creative and maybe take a dance class.
Weekends I would wake at eight (which now I understand is a lie in) and enjoy freshly brewed coffee...
...before enjoying getting washed and dressed singing to my music (where clothes, shoes and accessories would match) and (in take of breath) hair would be straightened.
Saturdays would be spent visiting friends and family and visiting places all over. Driving and seeing where it took me. Visiting all the fabulous shopping centres and places of interest that the country has to offer that I have never made the effort to see when I had the perfect chance (although 'Me - in real world' does get access to doing lots of cool kid things that without kids you don't get the opportunity to do either even though you think it would be so cool to do).
Evenings would not always been spent out. A few would, of course, and doing a variety of things but I would like to offer to babysit for friends and family so that they could enjoy some Saturday Night 'alone' time with their loved one. I understand now that can make all the difference to a couple in the throng of life with 2.4 children.
Sunday would be race days. I would try and run in a race in a different area every other week. Again a great way to see lots of different place. The alternate weeks would be 'Lazy Sunday' the morning spent in bed, reading the delivered Sunday paper. Then getting ready to go and meet friends for Sunday Lunch at the pub, or cooking and having friends over before of course getting fully ready and prepared for the week ahead.
As I say I do not crave to go back to being young and single. But I suppose what this blog post points out to me is I miss organising and controlling my days time and activities. Lets face it we swing around on the pendulum of what the kids need and want and it's almost impossible to schedule anything with any definitive time line. It's inevitable that J2 is going to poop and need changing the minute I get his shoes and coat on. That's kids. I guess I would just appreciate time and what I did with it more.
But some time will come back and then I will be writing a blog reminiscing and rose tinting about the days and times life was unplanned, unscheduled and ad-hoc. But hey, I'm a laaaaddddddyyyyy and that's my prerogative.